Thank goodness--he decided to finally leave the '90s and shave off his make-believe beard. As partners, we try to be supportive of those in our lives--even if it means holding back what you really know to be true.
"I don't need to donate my Oxford shirts. They're still in."
"Jean shorts are fine for yard work."
"Yeah, earrings on straight guys are cool."
"Sure, this soul patch make me a hipster--even if I'm AARP qualified."
Honestly, the soul patch needs to be filed away with the red and black flannel shirts, the worn-out ball cap, the gold necklace, with Russell sweat pants. And so when the razor returned him to the right decade, I silently cheered. I had already shared this excerpt that I shamelessly stole from someone's blog to prove my case:
"A soul patch is that ugly tuft of hair that grows
above your chin and under your lip. Legend has it that the soul patch covers
(or patches) the hole from which your soul was extracted, which is why most
people with soul patches are soulless bastards.
TRUTH
99% of all soul patchers are douchebags, not
because of the soul patch, but because douchebags, by design, have incredibly
powerful urges to grow that little bastardy tuft of hair right under their lip.
So if you have one, be careful, because some people might be under the
assumption you’re a douchebag even if you’re not.
The soul patch is evil manifesting itself into
facial hair!
The only people who should have soul patches are
talent agents, baseball pitchers, grungy musicians, and those who are
active in the art of douchebaggery.
Like the Hitler mustache is associated with Hitler,
the soul patch is synonymous with being a douchebag. I can’t stress this
enough.
Patches are for elbows, knees, and flat tires, not
your face.
EXCEPTIONS
A soul patch in conjunction with any other type of
beard or thick stubble is acceptable and is NOT a sign of being a douche. It’s
not even a real soul patch.
If you’re covering up a scar, mole, or other facial
deformity, like a baby toe growing out from under your lip. It happens, it
really does.
The exceptions are few and far between, so shave
the soul patch before the soul patch engulfs your heart, mind, chin, and of
course, soul."
Honestly, soul patches are for boys trying to look like men, or for men who aren't confident enough in their stand-alone face. And he is neither.
Honestly, soul patches are for boys trying to look like men, or for men who aren't confident enough in their stand-alone face. And he is neither.
And thank goodness I shared it, for life is too short to be a douche.
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